A Farce in Chaguanas... (Let's Get Ready to Stumble!!!!!!!)

Squeezing as much hype out of such a nothing event as both the parties and the media possibly could, drizzles are being touted as downpours and fizzles are being reported as fireworks to unenthused crowds bussed in from rent-a-crowd junctions both far and wide, as an outsourced candidate, a reluctant candidate, a heavily discredited candidate and one who somehow managed to lose more than he could possibly win even before the thing got underway is how the Chaguanas West bye election is set to get, uh, underway.

First out of the blocks to trip over their best intentions were the People's National Movement who, after failing to find a champion from among their own ranks, chose instead to 'outsource' one from of their Round Table 'partners.' And while the leadership of the Balisier Crew continues to strenuously deny that this is anything like a coalition, the only other explanation available to those looking on from outside the church is that they 'borrowed' a man for the election. Either way, this decision is set to make history as in reality for this instance at least, the PNM is no longer at risk of 'losing alone.' And for all their big talk all along the way, one would have expected to see the likes of Faris al Rawi and David Abdullah rushing to throw their respective hats into the ring if only to use the opportunity to demonstrate that they had bite as well as bark, but sadly this appears to not be so.

And if one history making development in this one 'warm wet spot' of an election wasn't enough, definitively answering the question as to whether it is possible to lose a race before it starts, far and away the biggest loser in all of this (well, outside of the actual residents of Chagauans West themselves) has to be former MP for the area and former member of the United national Congress turned member of the Congress of the People Manohar Ramsaran. Tipped to have been given the Prime Minister's personal nod to represent her party and the Partnership from early on, Manohar resigned his cushy state job and made himself available for screening, only to find himself victim of a rule that for some reason did not apply to Garvin Nicholas, Herbert Volney, Errol Mcleod and Marlene Coudray before him. Informed rumor has it that what he did in fact fall victim to was a hissy fit from his (then former) leader of a real life party of five, but he has only himself to blame for remaining in that party so long after the ruse was up. There is an old Trini saying that when things are against you even wet brown paper could cut you, and Manohar seems to have walked away from what started as a sure thing with less than nothing, ending a less than promising career with nothing more than a promise for comfort, so the good people of the United Nations should be expecting a new Ambassador from these parts any day soon.

And if you think that that makes him the only fool in this errand you would again be wrong. Looking at Khadijah Ameen one can easily feel a sense of compassion for this girl if not full blown pity. Surely the law that protects children and animals from cruelty could be applied here, as the open fear showing on her face is no laughing matter at all. The music blaring through the loudspeakers as she stumbled confusedly onto the stage at Pepper Sauce Junction (I kid you not) screamed 'this girl is on fire,' but how exactly not even she seems to know.

And then there's Jack. Regardless of whatever happens next, the slow deflation of Austin Jack Warner on the national stage is bringing much comfort to many of the bones he personally 'strew' in the political graveyard and is being received like a shot of unexpected viagra to some sagging careers. To men like Badeo Panday and Ramesh Lawrence Maharaj this could not have happened to a nicer guy, and to former Prime Minister Patrick Manning, if ever there was a reason to get up and dance this was it in its joyous and absolute entirety. There are others still, and like the old saying be careful of whose toes you are stepping on today because they may be attached to the behind you may have to kiss tomorrow, to men like former Chaguanas Mayor Suruj Rambachan who Jack had replaced as Mayor by a Barbie Doll just to add insult to injury, many are now 'wining back' in eager anticipation and pure joy over these developments.

And now that all the announcements have been made, here we are.This is no gladiators match up, but a tired old man and two ambitious souls being taken advantage of by their handlers simply because they don't have the sense yet to know any better. Representation of the people is set to take another hit and the people are once again going to be poorly done by. Aspersions will be cast, promises will be made, history will be rewritten to glorify whichever side is recalling it, and the least among equals will once again prevail. With no heavy hitters in the race and no real chance of accomplishing anything of any real value, what started off as the mother of all elections has become instead a farce in Chaguanas.