Statistically, almost every teenager reading this article will try booze or drugs before they graduate. I'm the last guy in the world who is going to burst through the doors and break up the party -- I've drank enough alcohol and done enough drugs in a single night to put any random four of you in a grave. And this is the last thing you want to hear, because the whole point of partying is that for one night you don't have to worry about a bunch of shit. So I'm not going to be the asshole who starts preaching about childhood obesity to trick-or-treaters on Halloween. I had my fun, you should have yours.
But, there's a huge yet invisible difference between innocent experimentation and addiction, and when it decides to blindside you, it happens so hard and so fast that, in the words of Warden Samuel Norton: "You'll think you've been fucked by a train". It's important that you recognize it before that happens. And, just like with the mental health example, society isn't great about giving you the tools because parents prefer to just tell you to never touch the stuff instead. You're probably not going to listen to that, so you wind up with no help at all.
It never looks like an after school special. It looks more like a call to 911.
My advice isn't complicated, and if you respect yourself or anyone you know at all, I ask you this one simple favor that will take five minutes per month. It's as easy as reading a grocery list.
Bookmark that link, and once a month, visit it. Mentally check off any of those things that apply to you. If you have even one, it's not a good sign. But as you check things off, if you find that your mental pen is starting to run out of ink, it's time to take some serious steps towards finding an adult to talk to.
This wasn't a "find out five years later" case for me. It ate a third of my total lifespan, and I let it.
As I always point out with this issue, there are millions of people out there who can party with the best of them and then walk away unscathed. They can forget about it the next day and not come back to it for months or years at a time. Maybe you're one of those people, and I won't be the guy who points a finger in your face and tells you that you're wrong. All I'm asking is to visit that site. Give it an honest read... and if you find yourself checking off more and more of those points, come to terms with the idea that unless you put a stop to it, it's going to hurt you and everyone you love.
There's no shame in saying, "This isn't where I want to be. Can you help me?"
Why You Won't Believe it for Years:
You spend years in school listening to D.A.R.E. programs (or whatever anti-drug stuff they do where you live) telling you that one hit off a joint will put you in a coma. Then you actually try the stuff and realize that's bullshit, so you immediately ignore all other warnings, too. It's all the same shit -- puritanical adults clutching their pearls at the thought of spending Friday night ingesting anything other than Bible verses. Right? It's hard to imagine that your parents were in college too, at one point, and may have owned more than one bong. So trying to separate the anti-drug propaganda from the useful warnings becomes next to impossible. Especially when you're young and healthy and invincible, and your hangovers are over after breakfast.
And hell, once you're in college, that's all about drinking, right? That's the stereotype. The weird kids are the ones who aren't getting wasted.
And in the years after, you don't take kindly to words like "alcoholic" and "addict" because they're not a diagnosis - they're insults. They're terms used to describe selfish, weak people who ruin families. Nobody wants to be that. Even if you find that you are addicted, you sure as fuck can't admit it.
So you'll ignore it -- I ignored mine for 22 years before I finally swallowed my pride and admitted that I had a problem. You'll make excuses like, "I have a job. I'm a good mother/father. I pay my bills. I'm not hurting a damn thing -- I'm an adult, and this is my decision."
Totally your decision.
Yep. I did that too. In fact, there's over 120 pages of people coping with that very thing on our own forums. And what every single one of us have found is that at some point with addiction, it stops being your decision. You lose control over it, and using becomes involuntary. Willpower has nothing to do with it at that point.
But the biggest reason this gets prolonged is because nobody can tell you that you're addicted to something. It doesn't work that way because, just like me, most people will take it as name-calling and get defensive. The only way to start this process is for you to realize it and admit it to yourself. A lot of people don't have that kind of courage and self reflection. Do you? Here's that link again, just in case.
No comments:
Post a Comment
Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.